Paul Newman

Paul Newman

(January 26, 1925 – September 26, 2008)

If I had to pick my all-time favorite actor, it would be Paul Newman. The only time I ever saw him in person was when Alan and I were flying home from New York in 1977. We were in first class and he was sitting about two rows ahead of us. At one point during the flight, he was standing in front of the restrooms talking to a stewardess. I figured this was my opportunity to get up close and personal. I said, "excuse me" as I moved past him. After mustering up a little more courage (since I had already broken the ice) I waited until he returned to his seat, then went over and asked him for his autograph. He flatly refused saying, "I don't DO that." in a very rude tone.

I understand how stars must hate people bothering them for their autograph. I've never done it before (or since). But it wasn't like I was bothering him in a restaurant. He was just killing time on a plane. We were in FIRST class, so I wasn't some hick. And, I was seven months pregnant (give the lady some pity Paul).

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Bottom line? I've never liked him since. I didn't go to any more of his movies (I showed him). The best part was my retribution: When we got to Los Angeles, his wife (Joanne Woodward - also a movie star) was waiting for him. He didn't see her and walked right on out to the street. After waiting a few moments, I went up to him and said, "your wife was waiting for you upstairs." Gotcha!
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I never went to any of his movies after that incident. He ticked me off. But I still have a lot of respect for his body of work. He was probably one of the best actors of my time and he'll be missed.

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P.S. He was also a great humanitarian. He started a food line called Newman's Own and donated all the post tax profits to charity (at the time of his death this amounted to over $250 million.)

Have you read my blog yet?

I often wondered why no one ever comments on my blogs. Now I know.

Ills, Wills, and Pills

I’m 63 and my husband is 72. We used to make it a policy not to discuss politics and religion with our friends because sometimes the discussions could get nasty. However, at our age, we’re increasingly more willing to branch out and participate in the current debates because, hey, it’s way more interesting than our usual conversations which seem to be focused on ills, wills, and pills.

Happy Anniversary

Here we are on our 38th wedding anniversary - on our way to the Manhattan Restaurant in La Jolla for the best canelloni in town.

Here are some of my secrets to a successful marriage:

1. Never, ever, ever threaten divorce.

2. Never stomp out of an argument - give yourselves 1 hour to cool off, then try again to work it out (and don't think YOU have to always win).

3. No yelling and screaming - he's in the room. He can hear you. Calm down.

4. Treat him the way you want him to treat you.

5. Mark his calendar for important dates (like birthdays or any other time you expect a gift) so he's less likely to forget. If he still forgets, buy yourself a gift and give him a big kiss thanking him for it.

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I want him to be happy, he wants me to be happy. It's as simple as that.

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Where was God on 9/11?

There were 50,000 people employed at the twin towers of the World Trade Center. 2,603 lost their lives. 94% survived.
There were 23,000 people employed at the Pentagon. Only 125 lost their lives. 99.5% survived.
American Airlines Flight 77 could have carried 289 people. There were only 59 aboard.
American Airlines Flight 11 could have carried 351 people. There were only 88 aboard
United Airlines Flight 175 could have carried 351 people. There were only 59 aboard
United Airlines Flight 93 could have carried 289 people. There were only 40 aboard.
(and these passengers overtook the terrorists and prevented the flight from reaching
its target – saving untold numbers of lives.)
Two other planes were to have participated, but they were grounded after the first wave.

In other words, out of potentially 74,280 directly targeted by the terrorists, 2,974 died - more than 96% survived! Then throw in the potential targets of the last three flights that didn’t reach their destinations and you up the survival percentage to…let’s say, 98, 99%?

Make no mistake. God was there!

(That is not to say that we in any way diminish the losses of that day. All of America will be thinking of those who lost their lives and the families who mourn them. God bless you all.)

Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up

So far I’ve managed to keep the wrinkles at bay. Good genes has a lot to do with it, as well as using sun block, and a good moisturizer. But I think the biggest secret to good skin is not smoking or drinking. I can spot a smoker before they ever light up. I know that skin. There is one other secret that most people don’t know about and I’m going to let you in on it: Get rid of your worried/frowny/squinty face and replace it with a smiley one.

My grandfather used to say that after 40 we are responsible for our own face (well, actually Albert Camus said it first). He always used it in the context that we can’t blame what we’ve become on a bad childhood. But I’ve come to realize that there is a literal application. If we live an unhealthy lifestyle, we'll have bad skin and bags under our eyes. If we are a gloomy Gus all the time, our face begins to sag. If we frown all the time, we have frown lines. But if we live right and keep a smile on our face, regardless of what’s going on in our lives, those smiley muscles pull our face up and give us a more youthful look.

So, the next time you look in the mirror and you don’t like what you see – smile.
Photo credit: Dennis Mosner-Thom Lang – card@2008 Avanti Press.Inc

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe

My husband and I used to marvel at the strange friends we had. On the way home from an outing we’d say to each other, “why is everyone we know so different from us?” Our favorite saying became, “All the world is strange* save thee and me, and even thou art a bit strange*.” Then we’d ask ourselves if maybe WE were the ones who were weird. The jury is still out.

It is becoming increasingly evident however, that we must be the weird ones – since in forty years we haven’t met anyone else like us.

*The actual quote used the word “queer” but the quote is from the 1820’s when queer meant strange, odd, etc. It has an entirely different meaning today.

Mood Swings

My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings, bought me a "mood ring" the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods. We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time he'll buy me a diamond.

Pithy Words

O’Reilly is always asking for pithy comments and he loves to introduce words to his viewers (his favorite seems to be “bloviate” - which means to speak pompously and excessively). I’d like to suggest these two (from Wikipedia):

Sycophant (from the Greek sykophántēs)- which is a person who, acting in his or her own self interest, attempts to win favor by flattering one or more influential persons, with an undertone that these actions are executed at the cost of his or her own personal pride, principles, and peer respect. Such a manner is called obsequiousness (a noun), or obsequious (an adjective) which means “fawning”.

So, if you don’t mind, instead of calling people a “kiss-ass” or a “brown nose,” (which, to me are quite distasteful), call them what they truly are - a sycophant.

However, to call a person an obsequious sycophant would be redundant and pedantic (and you could even be accused of bloviating). But I wouldn’t let that stop me.